I don’t want to go to school

Woke up in the middle of the night, panicking about going to uni in the morning...just like a little kid with Asperger saying to mummy and daddy “I don’t want to go to school” with enormous fear of being rejected again.

I experience social rejections everyday and the worst part is, most of the time I don’t even know why. Every rejection is a sharp knife gliding through my heart and I bear the pain every single day until one day the pain goes beyond the threshold, and I break.

Perhaps escape is an easier option. Perhaps I should just hide away from the crowd. Perhaps I should close my mind and live in imagination forever.

Here I am crying like a baby murmuring “I don’t want to go to school” over and over again, except that there isn’t mummy and daddy beside me hugging and comforting me “baby, it’s gonna be alright...be a brave girl...mummy and daddy are always here to support you.”